Things That I Was Not Aware That Cats Could Do (part whatever, I'm not counting these anymore)

Ah. The life to which I wish to become accustomed.

This is Bandit. Here he is shown destroying my life. When I type on the computer I suddenly have an armload of bloated alpha tabby in need of a massage and a chin scratch. If I push him off, claw and bite marks appear all over me as if by magic. Remember what I once said about the terrorists winning? You remember that? I can't ####ing get any #########ing #### thing done when I am being crushed by a ####### cats. You try it. Go ahead, see what happens. This so isn't fair. I did not know cats could keep you from writing, much less keep you from doing anything else like sleeping, eating, breathing, etc.

More on the series discussing the endless horror that is cat fleas in a later post. I need to calm down when I discuss that. All my psychiatrists agree on that point. But I cannot go my happy place when Bandit makes me his prison bitch. ######## ##########ing cats.