Forward Position Overrun, Massive Casualties

At 0500 this day, a fortified position manned by Scruffles and Bear, who were in their bunks after an exhausting evening decorating the Christnukkah tree, was briefly attacked by Kwat Insurgents. Forward elements of the insurgents were able to breach Scruffles's position, but withdrew after being physically removed to the floor. The tactical situation returned to normal until a determined assault at 0700 by all known Kwat Insurgents in the contested local region. Bear found himself screeched upon by a Siamese on the right flank, purred and pawed at by the overlarge and appropriately named Sir Antonio Bandito on the left, legs held down by a moronic black feline who later walked across Bear on his way to attack Scruffles, who was fending off the dreaded sandpaper tongue of snow-white Blizzard of the Maine Coon faction, and additional indignities inflicted by the multitasking ambidextrous guerilla commander Bandit, who oversaw the operation. In a bold move, the fluffy warrior known as The Dipster captured and defended the pile of additional blankets by sleeping on it, preventing their use as additional shelter. The silver-white double agent known as Sophie watched over the fierce combat and gave it her blessing.

It is with regret that Scruffles and Bear report that they were forced to surrender to the insurgents despite attempts to hide under the covers. Scruffles abandoned the fortifications and was taken prisoner, forced to feed the insurgents. Bear played dead. The Siamese was not fooled and remained with the "body" to screech at it until the captured ration cans were opened and the long starvation of the insurgents (3.8 hours) was ended. This is Private Bear, signing off in shame.
 

I so totally win.